Mom......I`ll never get over you taken away so fast without
a warning. Although I should have seen you getting sick,
I never dreamed it would happen that soon. So many words
left unspoken, so many things left undone. All the hurt I
caused you in life, I`ll never have the chance to make up to
you. I shut you out of my life at times, not realizing you
were hurting to. All the lies I told you seemed so little then.
Now I`m constantly haunted by them. I can only imagine how
hard it was raising me alone after Dad died. And although
there were times I brought you much joy in life, there were
many times I brought you pain. I`ll feel this guilt the rest
of my life. I hope you`ll always know no matter what I put you
through, I never meant to hurt you, and I never stopped loving
you for a single second. I only hope I can now be the person you
were all your life and live up to what you so wanted me to be.
You truly are, as your favorite song was
"The Wind Beneath My Wings".
I LOVE YOU MOM

She sat at the edge of the viewing pond, a silver tear sliding
down a delicate cheek, watching the reflections. The Silver One
eased to her side and laid his head on her knee. “This is a place
of perfection, why the tears? I know you are new here – perhaps
I can help?” The angel gently stroked the Silver One’s fur as she
gazed into the pond. “this place is indeed lovely, but I know you
are also sad even here.” Now the Silver One gazed into the deep
waters. “He will not let me ease his pain though I try.”

“I didn’t want help – I was so weary. I did not see then that by
refusing help she would feel burdened by this guilt. It was my
choice and I did not listen to her pleas – her concerns. I never
meant to leave her that guilt.” She turned to the Silver One.
“How do reach her now, tell her all the words I left unsaid? How
do I tell her how much I love her and how very proud I am?” Tears
began to flow “I tried to do what would be best – I was so afraid I
would fail her after her father died. She was a good child – and we
crossed words, yes, but that is normal. I closed her out so many time
because I was afraid or in pain, I didn’t mean to hurt her. How do I let
her know how much I have always loved her, how proud I am of her?”
The Silver One looked into her eyes, “She will realize that what she
feels is grief – guilt is always a step on that path.” The angel looked
back at the Silver One “Will she one day realize she is so much more
than I had ever hoped for?”

© Candace ~~*~~ GhattenWolf 4/22/06

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